Don’t be so hard on yourself. Be perfectly okay with being who YOU are. Fully embrace yourself, flaws and all. Love yourself right where you are. Strive to do better, but don’t beat yourself up for every shortcoming that you may have. Be brave in your journey! Hold your head up high, and keep moving forward.Stephanie Lahart on empowerment
AD | Hello you beautiful, powerful, incredible woman!
After the year weve had, its been a bloody tough time to be single. As well as the fear of rejection, the worry there wont be a spark, what if they are a creep or even not who they appeared to be if you met online. Add to the normal worries, the worry of ”Are they contagious?” and its been a hard year. WELL I am here to share my top tips to get back out there, confidently, feeling empowered and sexy as hell! While staying safe of course…
Practice Self Care
Self care looks different to everyone, some people consider exercise self care, whereas I know plenty of people who think thats the absolute OPPOSITE of self care.. Maybe your self care is bubble baths and white wine, long walks on the beach or Hot Chocolate & a movie. WHATEVER it is, get it… PROPERLY. Im talking face masks, body scrubs, bubble baths, reading a book with a glass of wine just because its a Tuesday. The more love you put into yourself, the more love you’ll be able to give out.
There is no confidence boost quite like treating yourself to some sexy underwear, a gorgeous dress, some killer heels or a visit to the salon! Go out there and get that sexy lingerie then wear it just for YOU, what screams EMPOWERMENT and CONFIDENCE more than that. Knowing noone will see it but you’ll feel KILLER in it. Buy some new dresses that you feel incredible and confident in, whatever style YOU feel most confident in. When you FEEL confident, it radiates out of you for all to see! Love yourself, treat yourself, you deserve it. And once you do… you’ll feel way more confident and you’ll attract the right people and energy in.
Date Yourself First
Have you ever taken yourself out on a date? You should! I would definitely suggest once youve practiced your self care and youve treated yourself, take yourself out! For dinner, to the cinema or even just for a drink, whatever you do, set some time for you to enjoy your own company. You are a incredible, empowered woman who deserves to be treated like a queen, you need to treat yourself how you want to be treated.
Online dating gets a bad rep but there is a lot of good that comes from it, its been basically the only way to date during the pandemic! Getting to know someone abit before a first date means you can cut your losses before you even meet, if you have qualities that dont align, dont want the same things or simply dont click, you can sometimes tell when your still chatting. Saving you both the time. On the other hand, chatting and getting to know each other before you meet means theres less chance of first date awkwardness, youve covered the basics already! When you meet, youll feel already a bit more comfortable, knowing a bit about each other so conversation can flow.
Why not try some more niche, sexy dating sites, Subsanddoms and Mybdsmhookups are fantastic examples of sexy dating sites which are safe, easy to use and full of like minded people. Get out of your comfort zone and chat to people with a bit of added kink. Best part to these sites is they are for everyone! Whether your just a curious newbie, or long time BDSM fan, you’ll find tonnes of matches ready to chat. All in one safe, comfortable space.
Many dating apps now have safety features including the ability to block and report people, video chatting and the ability to get a Verified Tick, meaning you can confirm who someone is before thinking about meeting them!
Keep An Open Mind
They say opposites attract, and while I dont completely believe that, I do think theres a bit of truth to it. Just because someone isnt your usual ‘type’, or you would not normally talk to them if you were just out and about. Doesnt mean you shouldnt give them a chance! Put yourself out there, meet new, interesting people. Its not a bad thing if you meet someone who is NOTHING like anyone youve been with before, theres a reason it hasnt worked with them!
Try new experiences, find new things you love and are into, learn new things and gain new hobbies…
Push yourself out your comfort zone, you never know where you might end up, feeling sexy, empowered, strong and ready to meet someone new! Try something fun like Subsanddoms and Mybdsmhookups to meet fun, like minded people.
Keep Your Standards High!
KNOW YOUR WORTH!
Look out for red flags early, if you spot them, take action. Whether thats discussing it or ending things. You are too important and empowered to be in relationships or situations that arnt worth your time. There is no need to rush, and no need to settle! Dont make excuses for bad behaviour, for someone disrespecting you, or not treating you right. I KNOW noone is perfect, and I am not saying to find someone whos perfect all the time because they dont exist, you arnt perfect either. But someone having human flaws is very different to someone who is emotionally manipulative, a compulsive liar or a gas lighter. Follow your gut… female intuition is ABSOLUTELY a real thing. If someone doesn’t treat you right or respect your boundaries early on, they wont change or get better.
I like to say, imagine if a friend was telling you your story.. if someone was treating a friend the way someone treated you.. you wouldn’t make excuses. Youd tell them to sack them off. SO follow your own wise advice please, thanks!
I hate that I still have to stress this. But unfortunately this is very much the world we live in, as a female, we HAVE to actively take steps to not come to harm or put ourselves in any danger. In the age of technology there are a few ways to stay safer, heres a few top safety tips…
– Share your location with a friend and tell them where your going. You can send the physical location via any messaging app, absolutely do this if you decide to go back to someones place.
– Share your dates details with a friend – their phone number, pic from a dating profile and a name.
– Uber has a option to share your ride with a contact. Your friend can track your journey right from when your picked up, to when you are dropped off.
– Always meet in a public place like a restaurant or a bar. If you are going to meet outside then be sure its in a busy, public place preferably in daylight. Parks and remote areas are not the place you want to be meeting someone you dont really know.
– Meet your date out! Someone might offer to pick you up to take you out, but you dont know this person. Dont give them your address or get in the car with them! Always meet them out in a public place, see above!
– Watch your drink, no matter how friendly someone seems you just dont know, be mindful when accepting drinks. Either have them order them to the table or order them at the bar with them.
– If you are out and you feel like you need to end your date but you arnt comfortable saying something to your date, Slyly speak to a member of staff. Either go to the bar or excuse yourself to the toilet and speak to someone. Say you want to end your date, basically all bars have procedures in place to help you leave without causing fuss. Calling you a taxi, taking you out another way and letting your date know you wont be coming back once you are already gone.
– Get a taxi home after dark! AND when I say taxi, where possible you should get a taxi from door to door. Door of the restaurant to door of your house,
Get yourself out there, feeling sexy, confident and empowered. You deserve to find a epic love and have incredible sex, you deserve to be worshipped and treated like the queen you are… you may have to kiss alot of frogs but one day you will find your prince/princess. UNTIL THEN, enjoy the right.
Sunshine Sarah says
Great Post and fab tips for feel3your best self when dating! Solo dating is the best imo though 😂 you just can’t beat it plus you don’t have to share your food! 🙊 Xo
Loved this! Solo dates are the best though. I try to be consistent and take myself out at least once a month. Sometimes it’s just a walk in the park, sometimes it’s a bubble bath. I totally recommend it!
Eleanor Jones says
These are great tips for empowering yourself, especially after so long stuck inside with our social skills and confidence waning. Thank you for sharing x
Cristina Rosano says
These all great tips for empowering yourself! Honestly, I love the idea of dating yourself, it’s such a great way to get to know you and to treat yourself too! x