Writers block.
I have always thought it was a lack of inspiration, or having no motivation to write. At least this is how it came across to me from tv shows and films I have watched. A world famous writer, top of their game, suddenly loses the ability to just sit down and WRITE. No words seem to come out of their once beautiful brains.
But its not that simple… and I was extremely naive to think so,
Think of depression. When you are young and naive or old and an asshole, you might think depression is just being ‘sad’. But if you’ve ever been through it or seem someone you care about suffering with depression you’ll know that being sad is one of the smallest issues.
Same goes for writers block and inspiration – for too long I have sat at my computer and just felt … nothing. Iv got HUNDREDS of ideas of what to write or record, but when I go to push those keys… nothing. Its as if I have forgotten how to talk, like I had lost my voice somewhere. And I kept trying and sitting and thinking ‘come on Rachael’ … You’ve written countless blog posts and podcast scripts. You arnt out of ideas, you arnt out of motivation, you still want this just as much, so why arnt you able to type a damn word!
And then I would tell myself, ‘just START’. Thats the advice that I give to anyone hoping to start a blog or a youtube channel or a podcast… just START!! But it wasnt this simple this time, the writers block might as well have been a PHYSICAL BARRIER between my fingers and the keys, like my keyboard might as well have been in CONCRETE at the bottom of the atlantic.
The thing is though I didnt want to give up on blogging, not even slightly. I love what I do! Imposter syndrome might tell me I suck and should give up and writers block might try to make it so I forget my words but deep down my motivation is here.
So you know what I did… tonight I just had a sudden gush of blogging energy and I just started typing it out. Who knows maybe this could help someone see that writers block doesnt have to be forever, even though it feels debilitating at the time. Just got to be kind to yourself and give yourself the space and time to recover.
Whats funny is, I was scrolling through twitter earlier and someone had shared a post I wrote back in January because it helped them. My heart literally skipped a beat!! And I thought, if I dont write again soon I will regret all these little moments. And I most certainly wont get to experience any huge ones!
Thats when I sat at my computer and decided RIGHT, I am going to write SOMETHING this evening even if its terrible!!! SOMETHING is happening on my laptop.. call it tough love??? haaa.
I actually just googled ‘Blog Post Inspiration’ and told myself I WILL WRITE A BLOG POST FOR THE FIRST IDEA I FIND! Knowing I likely wouldnt even post it on the blog itself but at least I would be WRITING. And you know what the first article I noticed was... I’ve Got 99 Blog Post Ideas, and Battling Writer’s Block Ain’t One. And it hit me!! Write about what you know, the oldest advice in the book!!
I’ll be honest, I barely read the article.
I just knew that all I know at the moment is the STRUGGLE I am having trying to put the metaphorical pen to the metaphorical paper and damn it, I am a honest, real blogger who shares life with their audience so here is my current life! I have been CRIPPLED by writers block for about a month, actually longer and I am working on myself to come back.
Back, stronger than EVER is the goal. I have huge goals this year and lets be real, this patch of no working hasnt exactly HELPED.
Today Iv written a blog post, and tomorrow I plan on recording a podcast!
And at some point I WILL start a Youtube channel and stop just TALKING about doing it.
But for now, today, I have written a blog post. A real, raw blog post. Hopefully you can either relate or at least laugh with me!
Missed you guys xo
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